I struggle with allowing time and space to open up, to allow what I need to face next to arrive in its own time versus wanting to get through it now.ย 

 

I can feel what will be present to me next, itโ€™s just below the surface and rising up to my consciousness. I know exactly what it is and what I need to do.ย 

 

An obstacle that I must pass through if I want to grow closer to the freedom I desire.ย 

 

Am I fighting the urge to force it or am I just afraid to face it? Is it procrastinating or accepting that Iโ€™m not strong enough yet?

 

Iโ€™m in that comfortable place between layers and I donโ€™t want to leave here right now, but what if Iโ€™m just avoiding going to that painful place out of fear.ย 

 

Itโ€™s my struggle always, allow it to come on its own or take control and make myself face it today. In the end, itโ€™s going to happen either way and my life will change forever no matter which route I take. Iโ€™m wondering how different my life will be going forward depending if I wait or do it now.ย 

 

I can no longer wait for strength to come, I must find it. And find it I did.ย 

 

The longer you put off recovery the longer you stay in the victim role.